The more time I spend time with my kids as a stay-at-home mom, the more I realize the wonder it is.
As I was saying with my sons yesterday, we do not live ordinary lives…
… But extraordinary lives!
(They liked it :))
Here are 4 things I’ve discovered more and more thoroughly over time on being a stay-at-home mom, staying with them and unschooling.
1. We are free.
We follow our own rhythms and we are in control of almost everything.
We have a flexible schedule that allows us to do what we have to do in the day, like reading and chores periods, but otherwise we can follow our desires of the moment.
Instead of dragging our feet in the morning, we immediately embark on what fascinates us! (I write these lines at 5 o’clock in the morning.)
And we follow a rhythm not only natural in the day but according to the seasons.
Here it is rather quiet in winter, and we’re always on the go in the summer. (And we take full advantage of the sun!)
2. We can share our values.
When we delegate the education of our children, it is more or less easy to guide according to our family values.
And stick to them.
A mother was talking to me this week about her fear of compulsory vaccination at school, for example.
How often are we obliged to forego our values to conform to a social norm we don’t like?
Overconsumption with the stuff to buy (brands, cars to have), keep up with the pace of the job market that pushes us to go ultra fast, go to work or school or be babysat when we’re sick, have difficulty to promote our natural values (like having to give up breastfeeding because it’s too hard to express milk at work) …
As a stay-at-home mom, it hardly happens.
And you can talk to your child about your values.
With nice daily discussions, my kids became vegan by themselves last year.
3. It’s a great way to stay close
It is easy to observe the disintegration of families with all the times most stand apart… couples drifting away, children and parents moving away from each other.
I observe it especially with siblings. Which brothers and sisters remain close to today? Playing together everyday when they’re small and see each other several times a week when they’re older?
What I love about being a stay-at-home mom is that my children are always together and weave lasting bonds.
Living together can avoid all this drifting and keep family ties strong.
4. It respects their needs for attachment mothering
In the first years, it’s ideal to continue breastfeeding as recommended by WHO (beyond 2+ years), and babywearing on request. Being a stay-at-home mom makes it possible.
It’s recommended by several experts including Dr. Jean-François Chicoine and world-class author Steve Biddulph to stay with our little ones in their infancy. It’s most likely harmful for their development to do otherwise, as for the attachment-related part in their brain that develops a lot around a year and a half.
And being a stay-at-home mom, it fulfills their proximity needs even in the following years. As I mentioned in our book on homeschooling, studies on home education say that social development of homeschoolers tends to be better, because the basis of social bonds is with the family.
Often if we leave the choice to a child he will tell us that he prefers to stay with his family. (You can do the test if you want, detailing the options neutrally.)
Further reading on being a stay-at-home mom
To inspire you on your extraordinary momming journey, I’m recommending my all-time momming bible.
If I had to recommend only 1 book in the hundreds of books I have read on parenting and better living, it’s this one.
I’ve read it again and again, and each time I gain some new insights on being a stay-at-home-mom. (It makes me think I’m due to read it again.)
Here it is:
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